An outlining workbook for fiction authors. I created this because I found myself printing the page a million times. Each time I had a new story idea, I’d scribble it down and having it in book form makes it so easy for me to start a new project.
Personal journaling has always been a passion of mine. It started off as a deep internal need to write down my feelings and has evolved over the years. For a while, it was a record of my days that helped me preserve precious memories of my kids when they were younger. Living with a narcissist turned my personal journals into powerful anti-gaslighting tools. Looking back over my journals has always filled me with a sense of accomplishment and pride.
In 2018, I’m publishing tons and tons of personal journals. The series title I’m working on right now is “Your Journal” and the cover images are pretty random. I’m loving some of the scifi/ fantasy images I’m finding, and I suspect that my next personalized journal series will focus on that type of imagery. I might do a nature series, or kittens or unicorns or bearded men or something.
Here’s what I’ve got so far, be sure to follow me on Amazon if you want to see the play-by-play as each new title is released. Click on any image to view it on Amazon.
I’ve been writing fiction lately, and struggled to come up with complete story ideas. Fiction readers expect the middle to feel like the middle, they expect trials and tribulations throughout the story and without all of the essential elements of a story placed at appropriate intervals throughout the story, a book can feel “off” or “not flow.” I found myself printing multiple copies of story-writing worksheets to make sure that each of my stories flowed correctly and followed a logical path to conclusion. I’ve published “100 stories to write: Plotting and outlining” which is the first in a series of Workbooks for Writers.
YES- this, for me, is one of the most powerful quotes that I included in this book because it really defined the way I viewed my divorce. Married life was the opposite of everything I wanted in my home, in spite of all my attempts to force the relationship to work, I was constantly feeling like my dreams and goals were discounted and impossible.
In divorce, I was able to take the reigns on my life and build an existence that was more in line with my personal values. All those fights about food and clothing and child-rearing weren’t necessary parts of life and without the presence of another adult in the house, I could build a family environment that matched my personal goals. So we had peace. And we had healthy foods and we wore whatever made us happy.
I knew money would be tight, it always had been, but at least, in divorce, I knew that not a dime would be squandered on non-nutritive beverages, frozen pizzas and candy bars. Sure, we splurged every now and then but mostly we were just finally able to afford to have fresh fruits and veggies every day. The peace of mind that comes with knowing that you’re providing your family with the best of options is priceless.
In my married-dreams, I’d fantasize about peace. Sometimes that came in the form of escaping the home in order to be in nature and silence, relaxing without someone else’s angry or irrational input. But in the reality of divorce, I learned that the peace I wanted could totally come alongside the chaos of a big and busy family. It wasn’t “alone time” that I craved, it was peace and our home became peaceful in spite of the fact that there were tons of kids and their friends around. I always suspected that the one angry and aggressive personality was the cause of all the stress, but divorce proved it. Without the presence of an angry and emotionally manipulative adult in the house we could all just be ourselves and relax in safety and comfort. That’s peace.
The life I created after my divorce is filled with tons of peace, protecting the peaceful vibe in our home has been super important and I’m pretty sure that being ultra-sensitive to conflict has helped me refine which personalities I’m going to keep in my life and which ones aren’t welcome. Our new life is playful, cooperative, healthy and fun. What will your new life be?
I’ve never understood the “fear of being alone” so maybe I’m not the best one to write a journal prompt on this topic, but I know for a lot of people it’s real. When I was married, being alone was peaceful, except for my own nagging thoughts about “Why am I married to this dude?” And even those thoughts were of value because they led me to a place where I could set aside my personal delusions about what it meant to be a good mom and wife (modeling commitment by making the marriage work in spite of the reality that it never would and never did).
I actually like being alone. And I like being with people whose presence is just as peaceful as solitude. My kids, as they get older, often feel that way. We can share space without feeling overwhelmed by each others presence. We can “do our own thing” in solitude, peacefully. That’s the kind of company I choose. I don’t want to be around people whose presence is exhausting, people who suck the energy and life out of me, leaving me exasperated and dying for a breath of fresh air.
This quote resonates with me as being important for someone in the midst of divorce because so often the presence of a romantic partner can be intense, and when that goes away, people feel lonely and often need to re-learn what it’s like to be alone and at peace. So many people jump into a new relationship because they “need” someone around, and overlook whether or not that person actually adds positive value to their life. Jumping into a new relationship isn’t always wise, learn to enjoy being alone without feeling lonely and eliminate people whose presence doesn’t increase your happiness.
For more quote-inspired journaling prompts, get a copy of The Divorce Journal for Women and a pen 🙂
This quote is included in The Divorce Journal for Women because the plain fact is that happy marriages don’t end in divorce. If you’re going through a divorce, be glad it’s ending. Life’s too short to spend each day in a state of sadness, misery or loathing. If you’re not truly excited to wake up next to your partner, then why are you? If you’re not eagerly anticipating the time you’ll spend together, then why are you doing it?
Have you heard that phrase “Hell yeah or no?” If each day of your life isn’t a “Hell yeah this relationship rocks” then it’s got to be a “no.” And by all means, put an end to it, with dignity. Get out. Fast. Life isn’t supposed to be miserable, heartbreaking, full of miscommunications or negativity. If the person you’re in a relationship with isn’t 100% perfect for you then stop wasting your time (and theirs). You’ll never be your best self or find that perfect someone if you keep devoting your time and energy to a relationship that diminishes your effectiveness, happiness and peaceful existence.
“What have you done for me?” or “What have I gotten out of this?” is really not a question that has any place in a romantic relationship. If someone is asking you this, they’re probably coming from a position of not-really-mature-enough-for-a-relationship. Why would someone look for “what they’re getting” out of a relationship when the whole point of it is to RELATE. If the relating is good (the camaraderie, the bond, the shared happy moments, the feeling of being part of something special, the pleasure in the actual relationship is working) then the value that you bring to the relationship lies in you existing in a state of your-best-self.
A friend of mine actually had a relationship motto with her boyfriend a while back. “Whatever makes you more you” was the term they used for this. I loved the way that sounded because it placed their relationship in a position of being a tool for them maximizing their own personal impact by following their own passions, albeit fully supported by one another. It sounded like the relationship was secondary and complementary to their individuality and after being in a relationship where my individuality was crushed to pieces, that alternative sounded much healthier. Who on earth wants a relationship that diminishes their own personal effectiveness?
The reason I used this as a writing prompt in the Divorce Journal for Women is because NO ONE has any business quantifying your value as a person. You’re not worthless. You’re not useless. And if someone is looking to you to meet their needs, then they’re taking your energy away from meeting your own needs (which is a pretty shitty thing to do to someone you love). Your presence in any relationship, including the one with yourself, is to enhance the experience. It’s my hope that women in the process of divorce make their every day thoughts, activities and pursuits an exercise in personal growth and don’t let someone else decide what value you’re bringing to the table. If you’re not appreciated and loved for who you are, then you’re not in a healthy relationship. If someone is asking “what have you done for me” or “what have I gotten out of this?” then they’re not really seeing you, and there’s no point in trying to convince them that you’re worthy. Likewise, if you can’t look to your relationship and see that the individual in question’s mere existence has had an overall positive impact, then let them go.
This book is for stay-home moms. it can be disheartening to spend an entire day cleaning up messes that get messy again before your partner gets home, preparing, eating and cleaning up meals 3-4 times a day and looking around the house to discover that the overall condition hasn’t improved much over the course of the day even when you’ve spent every waking moment cleaning something. Or to come home after a day of outings and adventures to find that the bathroom fairies haven’t visited AGAIN. This journal is designed to quantify what you’ve actually done so that at the end of the day, at the end of the week or at the end of the year (because it’s a 365 day journal) you can sit back and see that you really weren’t wasting time. Click on the cover to purchase
Whatever is happening right now, if you accept the reality of the situation and don’t react with the intention of changing it, you’ll be a lot better off. Dealing with reality needs to be part of your plan otherwise you’re just spinning your wheels and going in circles trying to undo things that you can’t handle. You can handle this, make it part of your new plan.
I love the quote illustrated below:
I thought it would make a great journal prompt because It’s hopeful and empowering. It makes me think about what sort of steps I can take today to get where I want to go (or rather, out of where I’m at).I hope you enjoy it too.